I was watching “The Wedding Planner” the other day (please don’t roll your eyes…we all slip sometimes), and heard a line that really made me think. Respect turns to love. To have love, you have to have also have respect. It’s like the perfect recipe to any relationship. From a loved one, friendship, even with your mechanic. Respect is a serious deal.
I’m a huge fan of respect. I like that fact that I have people that respect me and I love respecting others. When I heard this line in the movie it made me really look hard at old relationships, as well as those I am currently in (not just in love-like ways), and see where I had lost my respect for those I was dating at some point or friends, family members, even retailers. And how in some cases they have come into my life again to win my respect back or others that I’ve just let them stay on the visible outskirts, not ever really addressing my feelings as to how I do or do not respect them now. It seems to me that at a certain point with some people, well, you just don’t need to deal with it, them or the situation anymore. Maybe in some cases, we get the lesson, we move on and we just let go so we can move forward and continue to grow. (Or in others we sit and harbor anger and resentment and stab at voodoo dolls and burn pictures. Personally, I like former vs. the latter here!)
Respect is defined as esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respect for her judgement. It is also the “condition of being esteemed or homered. (Thanks you once again to dictionary.com!) Hell, Aretha Franklin even sang about it, it obviously carries weight in our day-to-day dealings.
As I mentioned earlier, it is not only used for our “love” or personal relationships, but for our other ones as well – the professional ones, those outside of family or the love zone. Take my mechanic – I have been with Aziz for 12 years, ever since I moved to LA. I will never leave him. Why? Because from the get go, he showed me the same respect I showed him. He never tried to over charge me, and when I have had tough times he has always worked with me. I have sent many friends to him and I will continue to do so in the future. Why? R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
Now, there is a drycleaner out there that once would not take responsibility for their actions with the way they handled some of my good clothes. It took me a few days and a heated discussion to even get them to acknowledge their fault, but I have never gone back and will not ever go back. Why? Because I lost RESPECT for them. Once my respect for anyone or anything goes away, good luck getting it back (Yes, personal relationships as well!).
Respect is the new cool. Seriously. If we were all out there totally respecting the other person, then what do you think we’d have? A pretty chill new way of thinking and looking at things. Right?