I tried the flirting thing today – It’s something I REALLY seem to suck at doing so I’m making it a goal to be a little more open and a lot less controlling of situations (For those that know me, QUIT laughing!!).
Seriously, apparently I am not the best when it comes to truly flirting. Really. I would consider myself a flirt, because when I have nothing to lose it’s just easier. If I think I am remotely interested in someone, well – That’s a whole other ballgame now isn’t it?
Well, in my defense, it feels strange for me to even flirt with anyone. I don’t know why…It just does. Probably because I used to just sleep with people instead of flirting, that’s what I figure. But whatever…A girl’s gotta learn sometime.
I was at the grocery store here moseying around the cheese section looking for some good stuff to bring with me to “girl’s night”, and had that feeling that someone was looking at me. I looked to the left and there was this boy (I call them all boys, but he was a man. At least I feel like he was over the age of 18…) Anyway, age aside, he was a cutie AND he was smiling at moi!
After the initial first wave of “Nice! Hot boy checking me out” I immediately felt the urge to freak out inside with thoughts like, “He’s looking at me and this is not my best angle” Or “Was I just busted talking out lout to myself at the cheese section?” (I’ve caught myself twice this week speaking out loud to the TV. Embarrassing.).
No, I told myself firmly. This is the year to flippin’ flirt back. I would not be thinking this if the last few people I dated hadn’t had told me that I was a “hard read” and gave them a different impression with my version of “flirting”. I guess I come across too “eh” about things and just don’t mean to. Or never really knew I did.
I closed my eyes, took a quick breath and met his gaze. I smiled back. I even held the gaze a moment more than was comfortable for me – Which is a big deal in Anne world! Then he looked away and did the coy look back – It made me giggle and I gathered my cheese and strutted to the line to pay for my food and go. And that was that!
It’s not like I’m building a rocket ship or daring to change our political climate…I’m talking about doing something for me to shake things up a little. So I’m off to pick up my Chinese take out from across the street and practice flirting a little more. In fact, I’m starting to find it fun. What once scared me and sent me in to “I don’t see you looking at me mode” is now beckoning to me, calling out to me, saying, “come look and flirt, too”…
Hey, I was told to find a hobby !
PS – Follow me on twitter! @Anniekemp